Four Decades
Dad’s Letters
Letters for living life on purpose.
by Kyle Mast, CFP®
To my sons,
Today I’m forty. Woah, let’s just let that sink in. I’m a very reflective person overall so age milestones are pretty thought-inducing when I hit them. As I strive to live this life that God’s blessed me with to the fullest, I often break my goals and thoughts into categories I’m responsible for. These are some of my thoughts in these areas as I hit the four-decade mark.
Work
Work is a blessing, a God-given privilege to learn, grow, and create as he did.
Plan well and don’t let others decide what you are called to do in your work.
Think in seasons. There is a time for head-down hard work (but it better not be all the time) and there is a time for rest and reflection.
Pivot quickly when work has run its course. There is a time for perseverance and seeing things through but it should not be mistaken for complacency in moving on to the next thing God has for you.
Finances
Spend far less than you make.
Take higher, yet calculated, risks when you’re younger.
Always plan and be wise with the resources God has given you because you have no idea how life can change tomorrow.
One of the greatest things about being wise with your finances is removing this variable from decisions when it seems that God is sending you in a new direction. Poor management of resources can hinder you from taking a new action when you should.
Health - Physical and Mental...
Walk, walk, walk. Treat and train your body in a way that gives you the best chance of being able to go on a backpacking trip with your grandkids someday. This will give you enjoyment now and in the future.
Eat less than most and as close to God’s original created food as possible.
Sleep and nap. Those who know me, even a little, know that I take a 10-15 minute power nap nearly every single day. This transforms my afternoons. Go to bed early, get up early.
Read... and read with wisdom. Books are compilations of the greatest thoughts a person has. Not all of these thoughts will be correct so you must not adopt everything, but the more quality material you read, the more joy you will have in this life.
Friends... Deep Friends and Relationships
You don’t need a thousand friends. You don’t want a thousand.
You don’t need hundreds of friends. You shouldn’t want hundreds of friends.
A few good, deep friends, yes, two to five good, deep, loving, honest friends are what you want. Don’t fool yourself into thinking that you can have more than this number and go deep enough with each other to be able to have a significant impact on growth in each others’ lives.
These are friends that you don’t always agree with (you will be friendless if this is your criteria) but they are people that if your kids turned out like them you would be very proud.
These friends will change throughout your life, and that’s okay. It’s a beautiful thing that God has us on different paths.
Relationships are hard. People are hard. And some, sadly, no matter how hard you try, will treat you poorly or misunderstand you. This will always feel bad, and should. But it will be okay. God is still good and will never leave you.
Father
If you’re a dad, this is your second most important role in this life. Treat it as such with the amount of time you spend with your kids and the amount of time you spend learning to be a better father.
Become known for apologizing. Pride is the killer of deep relationships, especially with your kids.
Make it easy for your kids to honor you and be the person you would like them to be.
Husband
This is your most important assigned role in this life.
Spend a tremendous amount of time learning, re-learning, and learning some more on how to be a husband who sacrifices for his wife as Jesus did for us. This is a great joy that we have the privilege of doing and will bring you a relationship closer than any you thought was possible in this life.
God
Talk with God constantly. Thank him always. Ask him for help in everything, great or small.
Soak yourself in his words and memorize them. God’s word will guide you in your darkest moments when no one else can.
The more time you spend with God, the more you will realize how inadequate you are and how wonderfully powerful, loving, and gracious he is. This will slowly melt away more and more of your pride, and this is a great thing!
The Man of God
(I re-write this by hand in every new monthly or quarterly journal. I fail on all of these of course, again and again, but this is my ideal.)
Exudes the joy of being saved by Christ, and lets others know.
Asks deep, interested, loving, and gentle questions.
Is honestly humble, reliant on God for all wisdom and guidance.
Is available with emotional, physical, and financial resources when someone is in need.
Seeks integrity and goodness in his thoughts and actions.
Sees difficulties as opportunities and trusts God’s perfect will.
Is slow to anger, but speaks with unwavering strength against wrongs.
Treats everyone as an image-bearer of God.
Is the person he wants his children to be and makes it easy for them to honor him.
Kyle (Dad)